Panties

Panties...


Yes, I'm going there.

My mother has baby pictures of me wearing those frilly panties with the ruffles on the back.


Aunts and grandmas lifting my dress to ooo and ahhh at the darling underwear that covered my diaper
                               
                                          source


Then came the cotton briefs. They were comfy and came in four colors..White, Pink, Blue and Yellow. I could care less. They served their purpose.


Then something happened...in my late teens/early twenties I chose to abandon the comfy cozies and instead opted to torture my bottom with THE THONG.


I was told that Visible panty lines were worse than a unibrow


The only way to correct that fashion faux pas was to wear two little patches that were attached by a string.
                                                 

           source


A thin, irritating, yeast-infection-attracting string.

The first time I had one on It felt like I was wearing barbed wire.



I tried to ignore it. I went about my day, but all I kept hearing in my head was take it off! take it off! I can't wait to take it off!



I held out and eventually I got used to wearing them. But they never felt comfy cozy. Barbed wire never does




As I got older my heels became shorter, Designer jeans were replaced with old navy sale jeans and sexy red lipstick was replaced with chapstick




 Victoria Secrets and I broke up




and I have since had a long, loving relationship with Hanes for her.
                   
                            source

                     

P.S. This is not a paid endorsement, but if Hanes Execs would like to fork over some cashola...This V.P.L showin' girl will not say no